Domestic violence poisons all corners of the world reaching every culture and religion. Its prevalence poisons every society. Despite its prevalence, though, it is still not recognized as a crime and is still covered up by those who see it as a personal issue not to be discussed outside of the home. This is as true in Christian homes as it is in Hindu and Muslim homes. Domestic violence is allowed to prevail as long as it is hidden away in the closet under lock and key. Denial and silence are its best friends as they allow this dark secret to hide from the light of awareness. What's more is the people trying to raise awareness especially in specific cultures are criticized and attempts to silence can border on harassment. From here in the United States to India, Muslim countries and the Republic of Congo, victims and advocates can suffer tremendous abuse and even murder for standing up and speaking out, particularly in places like the Congo. Below I discuss the women of the Middle East. I was going to discuss several countries like India and the Congo but this has proven to be a bigger project than I thought so I've decided to cover one at a time.
Inside Islam and the Middle East
Arabic countries such as Afghanistan, Tunisia, Egypt, and Saudi Arabia are well known to be countries are ruled by the laws of Islam and Muslim leaders. They are also known for the widespread problem of wife beatings and women's subservience and subjugation to men. Women in these countries have no rights as they are seen as property of men. A single woman is not allowed in public without an immediate male family member and married women who are seen in public in the accompaniment of a man not her husband or immediate family is punished through violent means. She doesn't even have rights to her own children. They are considered her husband's but not hers. The movie, "Not Without My Daughter," based on a true story, tells the story of an American woman who followed her Iranian born husband over to visit his family and is forced by her husband and his family to stay. When she enlists the help of another American woman trapped in the same situation, she and the woman are both beaten by their husbands, and she is forbidden from speaking with anyone again. His family is even assisting him in his imprisonment of his wife. She learns that even if she was able to leave, Iranian law forbid her to leave w/her daughter and so the attempt to escape with her daughter begins. She is successful in escaping w/her daughter but the movie depicts the entrapment and violence women are forced to suffer in these countries. If you watch the video below it proves the existence of these type laws. Two Afghan women are publicly flogged for running away from their husbands (who they were forced to marry).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fvwp&v=E3Za1GcHwKI&NR=1
According to http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12920614 domestic violence in these countries and in the Muslim community is largely ignored and those who do try to fight back, escape, or speak out are severely punished.
In Arab and Islamic countries, domestic violence is not yet considered a major concern despite its increasing frequency and serious consequences. Surveys in Egypt, Palestine, Israel and Tunisia show that at least one out of three women is beaten by her husband. The indifference to this type of violence stems from attitudes that domestic violence is a private matter and, usually, a justifiable response to misbehaviour on the part of the wife. Selective excerpts from the Koran are used to prove that men who beat their wives are following God's commandments. These religious justifications, plus the importance of preserving the honour of the family, lead abusers, victims, police and health care professionals to join in a conspiracy of silence rather than disclosing these offences. However, a fair reading of the Koran shows that wife abuse, like genital mutilation and "honour killings" are a result of culture rather than religion.
One thing to remember when looking at this culture of violence, however, is that (as mentioned above) the Quaran does NOT in any way condone wife beating. It is the Arabic culture not Islam that condones violence. In fact, as the video below proves, Allah condemns wife beatings (the Dr in the video does admit wife beatings occur as a way of "reforming wives").
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfPSN_92v2w
So, my question is if the Quran is against wife beating why is this so prevalent in Muslim countries and why are the radical Muslims like the Taliban the ones who practice this the most? The only thing I can think of is they're passages of the Quran out of context and interpreting them in their own way. Allah does say as a last resort you may hit your wife but means gently as the Dr in the above video says. Allah, apparently, does not mean beatings. Then again, looking throughout history, religious books have been including the Bible even have been used to justify certain heinous activities. For example, the horrors and violence of the Spanish Inquisition, the Witch Hunts of Europe and Salem, and the Klu Klux Klan (KKK) were all done in the name of God and the Bible. One can make a case for anything by taking things out of context.
Another answer to that question can be found by looking into the Muslim belief that women have no rights as also mentioned in the video. Take this belief and the new Islamic Law made up by the Taliban and we have a recipe for violence against women. The Taliban's insanely strict laws force women to wear Burqas and forbid women over the age of 10 from attending school. According to other Muslims, the Taliban have also taken Islamic Law and made it into something completely different, not based on the Quran at all. http://www.beliefnet.com/Faiths/Islam/2001/05/The-Talibans-Islam.aspx gives more information on this new interpretation of the Taliban.
For more info and statistics on Muslims and domestic violence see:
http://www.apiidv.org/violence/muslimwomen.php
Also from the same website, a poem:
Story of the Unknown Woman
Huma B. Dar
My name is Farah.
I am the one pierced by a dozen bullets
on my mother’s orders
in my lawyer’s office
My sin: I had dared to ask for a divorce.1
My name is Gauhar.
I am the one almost run over
by a truck or is it okay to blame the truck driver?
My crime: my “Otherness” exposed in the land of the free
wearing a shalwar-qameez
for every one to see.2
My name is Sultani.
I am the one who lost count after the rapist number three
or was it number thirty?
Faizan, my months old baby, kept on crying
for hunger
at the sight of my breast cut off
My crime: I am a Muslim
being cleansed,
ethnically.3
My name is Simurgh.
I am the one whose stomach was kicked
child abused and kidnapped by a husband
while his sisters cheered him on
My sin: possession of a voice.
Are voices contraband?
My name is Kausar Bano.
I am the one – nine months pregnant
raped, belly cut open, foetus on trident
both burnt to ashes
My sin: being a Muslim in Gujarat.4
My name is Fatimah.
I am the one whose name and its shadows
Melted and evaporated into oblivion
in the alchemy of fire on nine-eleven
when Hawwa’s strong bones
at the foundation of it all
cried out to be excavated
as once she herself had
through the darkness of the Middle Passage
Our crime: lithe bodies
deemed capable of labor
enslaved and indentured, undocumented, uncounted
marked unmournable.5
1
This case happened, albeit to a victim with another name, in the renowned
Pakistani lawyer, Hina Jilani’s office, in Lahore, Pakistan.
2
From an actual hate-crime in Texas, post 9/11. Name changed.
3
From “The Survivors Speak” – a report of the Gujarat pogrom by the Citizen’s
Initiative, April 2002.
4
Ibid.
My name is Sherbat Gula.
I am the one whose three babies didn’t make it
to age five
in the land of the land-mines
while my burqah was the talk of the town
and my eyes green were labeled “ferocious”
My crime: born close to warm waters
and black gold
I am told.
6
My name is Unknown
I am the one whose burnt face, cut at the nape,
droned, white phosphoresced, or raped
couldn’t tell my charred story
whose name, face or story didn’t make the headlines
in the conspiracy of silence
My crime: they say we are “terrorists”
or too close to some, and thus
“Collaterally” damaged!
I am Unknown, I am Sherbat Gula,
I am Kausar Bano, I am Hawwa and Fatimah,
I am Simurgh, I am Sultani, I am Gauhar, I am Farah.
I am your mother, your aunt, your sister,
I am your neighbor, your friend, your lover,
I am you
Stand with me as I fight for justice
Hold me Embrace me
Reclaim me Honor me
Love me Kiss me
for I am you.
Asian & Pacific Islander Institute on Domestic Violence
450 Sutter Street, Suite 600
San Francisco, CA 94108
First published with the poet’s permission, 2011.
5
A homage to the undocumented people killed on 9/11 and to the unmarked slave
graveyard found beneath the erstwhile Twin Towers.
6
The woman whose face made it twice to the cover of National Geographic,
surrounded by sensational journalism.
Things to think about and remember.
XOXO,
Lavender
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